#35 Good News Bad News and just news

Well this has been an interesting, fun, stressful, OMG month.

Lets start with good news, could be worse news:  The house.  

Good news is we are happy and love living here.  It is peaceful and roomy.  People here are great.  I personally like the weather, even the heat.  Goodyear was a good choice for us.

Could be worse news is...So after we moved in it seems all the spots on the carpet from years of traffic through this model home decided to reappear.  It was so ridiculous.  Here we have this beautiful home and the carpet in the teen room looks like someone changed the oil in their Harley on it.  I hated it, so I talked LJ into replacing the carpet.  We found this wonderful local company with great reviews.  I kind of knew what we (meaning I) wanted, so we decided to go to their store and talk to someone.

We walk in the door and we just fell in love with the owner, Sarah.  She is wonderful to talk to and I bet a kick in the ass to hang out with.  Her dad started the business 48 years ago so she grew up in the carpet business.   I tell her I loved the carpet we put in the last house.  Didn't know the name, but knew it was manufactured by Shaw.  Described it and believe it or not, she walked straight over to the samples and picked out the exact one.  I remembered the name as soon as she showed it to us.  I was dumbfounded.  Now that's someone who knows the business.

We had a nice conversation when she (yes the owner) came out to do the measuring.  Ordered it and they came to install it.  Ripped out the carpet in the teen room, guest bedrooms and master bedroom and the closets.  Laid the pad and.......................I swear Karma has it out for us...... the carpet has a flaw in it.

Sarah comes out and explains whats going on.  It's a mill mistake that isn't easily seen in the warehouse so it has to be reordered.  She is so apologetic.  They literally offer to lay all the carpet as if it was okay and put all the furniture back.  Then when the replacement comes in they will move the furniture out and rip it all up again.  We both said that was ridiculous.  Just leave it alone; we will manage.  So they threw some carpet in the master so we could have a bedroom.  Put our bedroom furniture back so we have a place to sleep.  Replacement carpet won't be here until the 15th.  Oh well, it just is what it is.  Now mind you, I couldn't see the flaw.  But they did and finally they were able to get me to see it.  I am so impressed with their professionalism.  That's why we do business with locals as opposed to the big box stores.  They survive by their reputation and actually cost less overall.  But bad news is half the house is carpetless, so.......we wait.

In the interim, we are having my future craft room floor redone in tile by the same company.  So ALLLLLLLL the furniture in the house except our bedroom is in the dining room lol.  I feel like we are living in a storage unit.  Scooter doesn't like things out of place so that poor little dog is beside himself.  They start that little project tomorrow.

Moving on..
The builder finalllllly replaced our dishwasher and microwave.  Of course that was not without mishap, lol.  The microwave installer dropped the big ol trim piece on my lower cabinets, causing a small gouge and scratch😬.   So another phone call..another contractor out to fix that.  Nothing in this household goes smoothly, lol.

Saga #3...
Did I mention when the builder did some minor repair work to the walls the painter used the wrong sheen of paint?  Color was ok, but somehow flat painted over eggshell juuuuuuuust doesn't blend.  So that required an extra visit from THAT contractor, lol.  Twice... I won't even go there... just use your imagination.  

Lets see... what else.
Oh yea.  The pool needed renovating since the builder never maintained it properly.  Water was causing damage to the surrounding travertine.  A repair is needed before it really causes an issue.  The Palo Verde trees behind the pool were dropping all kinds of crap into the water, clogging the filter.  Plus twice a year those trees drop thousands of little teeny yellow flowers and the pool has to be shut down until it's over.  So those have to go.  Worse trees ever you could plant near a pool.  Aaaaand the palms were starting to outgrow the pillars.  Also the rock face on the middle pillars was damaged, again because the builder didn't care for the pool properly.  We were able to get the builder to fix a couple things...minor things.  But because the pool is functional, we have to do the rest.  So bad news is our pool is in the middle of a remodel.  Good news is it will be pretty when it's done.  Can't wait to add color to the area by placing pretty pots out there..oh look.  Another shopping excursion needed.  hmmmmm 

But, no.  I'm not regretting moving to a house.  I love it here.  

More on the good news side...

Halloween was fun.  We have a fabulous single girl (37) who's in the military reserve and teaches HR to companies around the country as our neighbor on one side.  She is so much fun and we have unofficially adopted her.  She (Alexis is her name) and I sat out giving candy to the upwards of 75 kids who came by.  It was a blast.  She is so interesting to talk to.  She has lived quite the life in her 37 years.  Had the pleasure of meeting her dad when she moved in.  He's very nice too.  Career military.  We watch out for her since she has no one close by.

Our neighbors all around us are great people.  So welcoming and just plain nice.  We got lucky.  On the other side of us is a couple who were high school sweethearts.  They have six daughters and we never hear a peep from them except the occasional weekend when the family is out back enjoying their yard (as it should be).  Directly across the street is Justin and his family (two daughters and his really nice wife, Allison).  They do like to decorate for the holidays.  They felt sorry for Alexis and I with relatively no decorations for Halloween, so they brought us over a talking pumpkin to sit by our candy table. 🎃 Hopefully next year I can get Mr. Bah Humbug in the spirit.

Neighborhood residents are planning to do a UTV/Golf cart parade around the neighborhood before Christmas.  You are supposed to decorate your vehicle and drive around the entire square mile of houses, spreading Christmas spirit and enjoying the lights.  Yea, I think LJ's not doing that.........this year hahahahahahahaha.  He also said I can't put up 9 trees like I have in the past....(this year)

How about good news in the fun department:  ATV'S

LJ has been doing well.
He was able to go to Utah for a week to join his atv riding group.  He really needed that.  I could tell he was having a good time when he called.  He is able to eat limited foods now, so that makes it much easier.  All of his esophagus stretches were successful.  While he was there, he decided he deserved a new side by side.  A new one...cuz the other one was not a Can Am, and all his buddies, i.e. Rich Kropp, have Can Ams.

Now mind you, I like the Can Am.  In fact I had mentioned while we were still in the RV he should sell the Polaris and get one.  No, he said.  That would be stupid, he said.  The Polaris is only a year old.  Why would he do that.  That would just be silly.  But now, three months later, he should do that.  Oh reallllllllly.... and why is that.  "Because I deserve it and it's more better, hahahaha."  He's right.  He's been through hell this year and we don't know what the future holds, so why not.  So, yes, he got one.
But wait, there's more, lol... and it doesn't quite fit in the bed of the truck, so he needs a trailer to haul it home.  Sure... why not.  It's only money...the kid's inheritance.  WTH.. they are successful in their own lives so screw it.   LOL. The smile on his face is worth it.  Looking forward to taking it out this year, after he buys the hundred and one things it needs to spiff it up.  But I am certain I really need to do some catching up retail therapy of my own...what's he going to say? haha

Scooter News:

His room. bohemian style

Hides in the guest room

Scooter is doing well.  He loves it here.  Plays ball almost every day.  Loves his room where he can stare out the window and bark at things.  When he's bored with that, he goes into the other guest room to hide.  It's quiet and a little darker in there so he likes it.  He likes to chase the skimmer net in the pool, lol.  He does wear a life jacket, though.  I've been teaching him how to get out of the pool just in case he falls in.  But still, he's not allowed in the yard by himself.  Too many critters and what not.  He's not a fan of contractors and is puzzled by all the activity going on, but just goes with the flow.  I think he'll be glad to get his room back, though.  He's not sure what to do with himself lol.

Scooter and his life jacket

More good news in the LJ saga:

He has been eating so much better.  We have actually been able to go out to eat..chinese, Mexican and even the steakhouse where he ordered fish.  What an improvement over even a month ago.  He can eat my home cooking and swears it's not bland hahahahahaha.  That, for me, is an upside to radiation treatment...my food tastes good😎






And here we are... the bad news part of our journey.

So, saw LJ's Urologist today (11/5).  He had a second opinion pathology done on LJ's kidney that was removed.  We were initially told by the local pathologist he found no cancer.  It never sit right with the doctor.  It didn't make sense with all he saw, and the spots on LJ's remaining kidney that it wouldn't be cancer.  So he kept after it and finally got the results back.  His removed right kidney DID have cancer, so there's a strong, albeit rare, possibility the spots on the left kidney are also cancer.  They are growing and they shouldn't be.  Regardless, they must be dealt with.  We are thankful the doctor didn't let it go.  Better to deal with it than ignore it.

So now, poor LJ, who is getting so much better by the day is faced with another challenge.  No matter what he chooses, he faces a possibility of dialysis.  And that is scary to him.  It can be life changing.  He most likely would never be a candidate for a transplant because of his cancer history and his age, sans a direct donation.  But we aren't there yet.  There is still hope with treatment this will turn out ok.  His left kidney is functioning well, so that's good.  We see a radiologist soon to determine the next course of action which will be the freezing of the spots.  The concern is the damage to the kidney function.  There is no way of knowing how the kidney function will be impacted until it's done.  We've been gut punched again, but we made it through the first two cancers (We think) so we will make it through this.  He goes for his next PET scan on the 18th and we get the results o the 25th.  That's when we should find out how the other cancer treatments went.  So far all preliminary tests say those treatments went well.  

He's a test case, that's for sure.  Three separate, distinct, unrelated cancers is extremely rare.  It's very rare to have cancer in two kidneys.  I call him Mr. Special.  or maybe Mr. Challenge, since he likes to give the doctors a challenge in how to treat all this.

He's taking it in stride on the outside, as am I.  But inside, I know we both are just sad.  Too much living to do to let this stop us.  But, sometimes you just can't control what life gives you.  So, I guess we will fight till the end.  Maybe he's not only a rare test case, but also that guy that survived all this.  I hope so.

So that's where we are today.  Back to one day at a time.  I can't wait for 2019 to be over.  2020 HAS to be a better year.  I know they say God only gives you what you can handle...But I'm pretty sure the load LJ is carrying is heavy enough.  Time to lighten it up.

Keep those prayers coming...we still need them.

Pool before, pretty but messy

Big trees gone, palms still there

Palms out.  Now you can see the deck

Let the demo begin

#34 He's Baaaaaaaaack!

Made me laugh...

So, on to the update.....



LARRY:  I finally have my husband back.  LJ is once again his old self, albeit a much thinner old self.  It has been a long hard year, but finally he is the guy I married.  It was hard watching him go through all he had to endure.  He still doesn't have a clean bill of health.  He has another PET scheduled for November so hopefully it will be good news.

In the meantime, we have a kidney update.  Apparently the spots on his remaining kidney are growing.  All his doctors are baffled by it.  All of them say that should not be happening.  Apparently, once again, LJ is "special".  So the course of action is first sending the removed kidney out for a second pathology opinion.  While they initially found no cancer, his Urologist wants it thoroughly checked to be sure they didn't miss anything.  Once they determine for certain there is or is not cancer in the removed kidney, they will address the remaining one.  For now, it appears the choice is to freeze the existing spots.  Stop them from growing.  The risk is damage to the remaining kidney.  Should that happen, LJ could be facing dialysis.  I know each doctor has said their goal is to do as little harm as possible.  They will do everything in their power to avoid dialysis.  Fingers crossed, once a decision is made on treatment, they are able to accomplish their goal.

On the good news front, the recent test on LJ's thyroid showed nothing...no cancer...It appears the radiation did, in fact, take care of what was there.  So that's one less thing to worry about.

Meatloaf with lottttttts of gravy

So, for now we just continue the doctor appointments and move forward.  Today, other than the terrible dry mouth and screwed up taste buds, it's like none of this ever happened.  He did have three esophagus stretches which has helped with the eating.  He will, for the rest of his life per the docs, have some difficulty swallowing certain foods, especially dry foods, and will have to drink lots of liquid to be able to eat.  Small price to pay to be alive.  He's adapting very well to it.  Heck, even my food is ok now.  Everything is bland to him so ..... hahaha

House:
What fun this has been.  On the one hand I LOVE OUR NEW HOME!  It will just be better once Meritage gets all the little things fixed.  Some things they have addressed.  Others... well, lets just say we have developed a sense of humor.  Had to or we would be in jail lol.  Let's see...where to begin.

1. The never used dishwasher doesn't work.  It's a model home and it was never hooked up.  But it's five years old and out of warranty so the builder is trying to figure out what to do (Hint: new one).
2. The microwave door doesn't open until the sixth time you push the button.  Took a month, but they finally got in the replacement microwave...wrong color.  They brought black and we have stainless appliances...sigh..And we continue to wait.
3. The sheetrock guys did some minor repairs...the painters used the wrong paint on a couple walls.  Ummm, what..you couldn't see it doesn't match?
4. Pool was not kept up so minor repairs needed there.
5. Front courtyard is always wet.  Appears to be from the excessive watering of decorative plants in pots.  Since day one we have asked that the drip line to the courtyard be disconnected...if only they knew where to do it..sigh

and the list goes on.  On the plus side, we have changed out some lights, added our own decor so its starting to look like our place.

Scooter and I go swimming a lot.  He has to wear his life vest and he knows it.  He doesn't stay in long...unless the skimmer net is being used.  Then his goal is to kill it.  He growls, bites it and generally tries to destroy it.  Funny as all get out.

He now has his very own room.  It has a king size people bed and a window where he can watch the world go by.  He actually spends a lot of time in there.  He sleeps in there most of the night, too.  I think he really likes the pillows on the bed.  He's not spoiled at alllllllllll.  Can't wait till we get our stuff from storage.  All of his dog decor is there.  Looking forward to doing his room properly.

Life in General:
We have adapted fairly well to Arizona.  I really like it here and so does LJ.  Even the "Hot" summer wasn't bad.  Yes the temp got high but it wasn't as bad as an over 100 day in Sacramento.  You adapt. getup early.  Stay inside.

Larry actually was able to go to Utah for a week.  I moved around a couple of appointments so he could just go enjoy life a little.  He's there now and is having fun.  He's doing very well physically and I know mentally it's what he needed.  I stayed behind to deal with warranty work on the house.  Next year...Next year we will go for the full three weeks and live it up.

That's really kind of it.  Nothing overly exciting, but life is moving forward...finally.  The hard part is behind us.  I have no doubt it is because of all the prayers and good thoughts sent our way.  And to that, we say THANK YOU!

new recliners for us old people

new lights over the bar

New Bedspread, Bed and lights

#33 ...one more thing

Robust LJ (10/2018)

1979 is the year I met LJ.  I met him in February that year, as a matter of fact.  In February of this year (2019), 40 years later, he started his radiation/chemo.  We've been through a variety of things in our 40 years together, but I do believe this is the hardest.  It's been hard watching him go through all of this.  For a while there I wasn't sure he was going to be ok.  The radiation and chemo took such a toll on him.  For a couple of months he wasn't my LJ.  He was sick and frail.  I'm used to the big, strong, doesn't act/look his age LJ.  For a bit he looked weak and elderly.  But he is starting to be the Old LJ again.  His wit and humor is back.  His goatee is growing back.  He was 250 and could afford to lose a couple pounds when we found out about his cancer.  Now he's skinny, but really he isn't as skinny as when I met him.  He was 175 then and 190 now.  I think a good weight for him is about 200/210.  But until he can eat solid food again, he's going to be on the skinny side.  He's still a little weak, although that is getting better.  He gets very tired, very easy.  Just a short trip to the grocery store can make him tired.  He's getting frustrated with the recovery time, but I think we finally have some answers.

LJ Update:  LJ went and had the "barium swallow" esophagus test done that the new ENT had ordered.  The day after he did the test, the doctor personally called.  It appears LJ has an extreme narrowing of the esophagus where it meets his stomach.  Without a deep scope it is hard to tell what is causing the narrowing.  Is it scar tissue? Just narrow?  Since he is an ENT this problem is located below his area of expertise.  So he personally referred us to the premier Gastroenterologist in the area.  He called the Gastro doc personally and we got in to see him within a week.  Once again LJ has been blessed with a fabulous doctor.  This guy has all kinds of awards for best doctor.  He is very personable.  Like the ENT, he is in high demand and very busy.  But he does not rush you.  He explains things and answers your questions.  He takes the time you need.

He showed us the swallow test images and explained exactly what it going on with LJ.  There is definitely a restriction.  It could be scar tissue built up over the years due to acid reflux.  He was sure it wasn't radiation caused because the location is largely out of the radiation field.  The narrowing is why he hasn't been able to eat.  It's why food, even liquid, comes back up.  It's like filling a funnel with a tiny opening.  You have do it slow and a little at a time.

He told us the next step is to scope LJ's entire esophagus.  Usually you don't have to be put completely out, but in LJ's case, he is going to put him completely under for the test.  Depending on what he sees, although he is fairly confident it is scar tissue, he will then "stretch" the esophagus to break up that tissue.  He can only do a little at a time because too much and you can tear the esophagus and then you have real problems.  In many cases it take three or four procedures before the esophagus remains open, allowing food to pass normally.  He said in LJ's case it may take more.  He will have a better idea after the first scope.  Normally these procedures are done two weeks apart.  It stretches, goes back a little.  But before it goes back to the same position, you stretch it again.  You do this until the opening is what it should be.  This doc is an expert in this field, so we trust him to know what is best to get LJ over this hurdle.

After the first procedure (scheduled for 8/29) he will let LJ know if he should try moving up to solid but soft foods.  Until then, liquid food...by mouth.  I'll give LJ credit.  He listened to the doctor and has been taking all of his liquid food by drinking it.  He says his taste buds are still screwed up but things don't taste as bad as they did in the beginning.  So another step forward.

I still feel sorry for him, but at least we understand (or I should say I understand) why he hasn't progressed like he was supposed to.  On the other hand, nothing, apparently, is ever simple on this road to recovery.  He's still not out of the woods and still has a lot to face.  But if all goes as planned, for once, the real progression will start soon.  I swear with all that is going on and being done, LJ will be like a 20 year old when he's finished.

He is disappointed he isn't going on his annual ATV trip in October (insert eye roll here).  Up until yesterday he was pretty sure he was going to go.  But these procedures will take him into the fall so no trip.  Of course then we went to the grocery store and I think the reality of his stamina (he has none) set in.  Shoot for your annual February trip I told him.  I think that is doable.  He should have his thyroid out and the esophagus fixed, along with no feeding tube by then.  In the meantime he can build up his stamina by walking around the house and yard.  Speaking of which...


House Update:  FINALLY.... we did the "fix this" walk through yesterday.  They were quite accommodating about repairing and repainting a lot of the walls.  Since it was a model, there were some minor wall repair issues.  Why the decorators have to hang every flipping picture with a molly bolt is a mystery.  Since we bought the house fully decorated and furnished they didn't have to do anything about the walls.  But they were pretty good.  I told them what would be coming down from the walls, so they fixed them.  I was reasonable, though, and didn't ask for too much.  The garage conversion is 90% done.  They still need to trim the trees so we can get the RV under them.  A few little things here and there.  We sign on Friday and close in 6 days.  It's finally here.

Scooter will finally have his home and his back yard.

I will finally have a pool and a place to craft, along with a real refrigerator and stove, lol.  Yea yea.. I know...I don't cook.  Says so on the sign I have in storage, lol.  But I am sooooooooo tired of eating at restaurants.  I am honestly looking forward to cooking again.  And I think some of the cooking shows LJ watches constantly have given me a desire to experiment.  I now have a great kitchen for doing that, so why not?!  Plus, it means I can go shopping for gadgets and what nots.  Annnnnnd I really need to lose this weight.  I'll be able to swim and eat right.  I know.  You can eat right going to restaurants.  No you can't.  They have stuff there.  Good stuff.  It's just too hard.  But I get through it by still sending LJ pictures of my food.  Now I'll just fix it and he'll have to look at it and smell it.

LJ...well...nothing really changes for him.  Comfy chair and a tv...he's good.  He'll just have a better recliner and a bigger tv hahaha.  He did say it isn't fair that after 40 years I have decided to start cooking and he can't eat.  Then he thought about it and said, well maybe that's a good thing until you practice for awhile.  😜

Oh.. and a realllllllll toilet and shower. Not that the RV doesn't have those.  But....if you own an RV and spend any amount of time in it, you totally get my excitement.  Two and a half years... Who knew a toilet and a shower would make someone so happy.

I am stressing trying to figure out how to get our stuff here from Reno, but, oh well.  Not like I really need any of it.  LJ won't let me do it without him so we will wait..........I'll figure it out.  Friends have offered but LJ is stubborn.  He feels guilty so we will get it when we get it.

It's still a little bittersweet.  And I won't lie.  I have had mixed feelings as it gets closer.  A part of me doesn't want to give up the freedom of the RV life...but with all that's going on, it's the right thing to do.  Once he's better we can take off whenever we want, for as long as we want.  But there will be home to come back to.  A home where the kids and grandkids can come visit and we can live normally.  I'll enjoy leaving and coming back.  400sf can get a bit cramped unless you are moving around the country.  And since we don't move around much in the winter...I'm good with spending that 5-6 months in 3200 sf with all the amenities 😃.

Scooter Update:  Poor little guy has been under the weather a bit.  He had a sore ear for a couple weeks.  Fortunately it wasn't bad.  No real "matter" in his ears, just a bit inflamed.  He's not a fan of the vet as you can see by his woe is me look while waiting.  He won't even look at me, lol.  But he's real good about letting them examine him and letting me put the drops in his ears.  Vet said it's pretty common and she is surprised in his seven years, this is his first earache.  She said we are pretty lucky he isn't prone to get them.  She also told me he might get them if he goes swimming, so to be sure to use drops to dry his ears afterward.  I am going to do some research for over the counter stuff before I pay for a prescription.  But, if he likes to go swimming, then whatever he needs he will get.  Speaking of swimming...

This is the little rat dog after he decided to fall into the pool chasing after his dad while dad was cleaning the filter.  (no we don't live there yet, but we pretend we do hahahaha). Scooter was trying to bite the filter basket and missed a step.  Splash... He can swim, we have learned.  Rather than immediately pick him up, LJ guided him to the big step so he could get out on his own.  I need to figure out what to put on the inside of the pool, just under the deck, for a beacon.  I realized from his vantage point the side of the pool looks the same all the way around.  But I want him to be able to find the step to get out if he falls in.  This is why he NEVER goes outside alone.  Well, that and coyotes and owls and ravens....  He does have a life jacket that we will put on him during swim time.  That way he can also build up his stamina and learn where to go without stress.  Just like us, he has been fairly sedentary over the last few months.  He needs to get back in shape too.  I think daily ball fetching and swimming will help him.  It'll ease his boredom, too.  There's nothing more pathetic than the sound of a dog, deep sighing, because he's bored.  Probably why when I take him somewhere he barks...kinda like a kid saying "are we there yet?"


He loves to lizard hunt and chase off the birds.  As you can see by the picture on the right, he also keeps an eye out for both when he is inside.  I think he thinks it's his job.  When not staring out this window, he goes to the big sliding glass door so he can see more.  It's the way he was when we used to have rabbits.  Watch for them, whine to get out, turn circles until you open the door and then chase them off.  He is going to be a happy little fella in one more week.

Now something our house has that I'm not sure we need is an outdoor fireplace in the courtyard.  It really is cool.  It has a switch to turn it on for convenience.  I'm pretty sure it won't be used in the summer.  But...in the winter and late fall, it can get a little chilly at night.  That's when sitting out there will be relaxing.  I do plan on buying an outdoor set with a fire pit table for the Cabana out back, but in the meantime, I can sit under the stars with my little fireplace going in the Courtyard out front.  It's a private courtyard, especially once we get the gate installed.  I never would have bought it, but hey, it's the model, so it came with the house lol.

We have been very lucky.  We are in the middle of monsoon season and I have been dreading it while in the RV.  50-60 mph winds with rain in an RV...nope.  But this year, so far, we have only had one real windy day and one hard rain night.  Don't know why.  Usually there have been several by now.  I will say that the East and South side of Phoenix has been hit pretty hard with the weather.  Even north and to the west of us have had some.  But for some reason it has skipped over us.  I think the weather gods know LJ and I have really been through enough, so they are sparing us...for now.  I see thunder clouds almost every day, along with some pretty dark skies...in the distance.  So for now...thank you Mother Nature.  You're kindness is appreciated.

So that's it for now.  Hopefully next week goes well.  House keys on Tuesday...esophagus stretching on Thursday.  Doctor followup visits the following week.  I'll post again in a couple of weeks.  Let you know if we survived.  Until then, thanks for reading and all your prayers.  Without them, I don't know if we'd be doing as well as we are.  💖

#32 baby steps

Well here we are, another month down.  I was reflecting the other day about our grand plan to travel and how that didn't work out for us.  I was sad and feeling a little regret.  But then I came across the above picture and it just spoke volumes to me.  Ok.. so we didn't get to travel in the RV like we planned.  It's not like we haven't travelled the heck out of this country on the Harley's and some in the RV.  Life dealt us a whammy.  But LJ is getting better...and life is good.  So while this isn't the life we planned, it's what we have and by golly it's better than what a lot of people are living.  So I am choosing to find the joy in our life story and see where it goes.  Now for the updates...

LJ:

It's been a busy month of doctor visits.

LJ had a PET scan done in early July.  We were given a copy of the results and it's all in Doctor speak sooooooo....  But from what we have been told, there is nothing too concerning.  A PET scan lights up when there are infected cells, including cancer cells.  There is still some "lighting" on the various parts but a lot less than before, so they tell us that is what they wanted to see.  Ok... I was hoping for NO lighting, but what do I know.  All the docs said the scan was done a little early so not to be concerned.  Ok... you're the docs and you obviously don't know me.

We saw an ENT who is one of five throat surgeons in the state.  He is the go to guy for difficult throat and tongue surgeries.  We were sent to him for a second opinion and to establish LJ as a patient just in case surgery is needed.  He is absolutely wonderful.  He takes the time to explain what he sees and answer all your questions.  I'm beginning to think the docs in Arizona are trained that way, lol.  He explained the first visit with him gives him a visual baseline.  He can read the reports, but this is the first time he has seen LJ.  He wants to see him again in a month to see what changes are present.  He did scope LJ and saw nothing too concerning.  He gave LJ three mouthwashes to use over the next two weeks...one for thrush...one for the reddening in his mouth and one for dry mouth.  It's been five days and they seem to be working.  LJ already says his mouth and throat feel better.  He also explained that any inflammation in LJ's throat or mouth can cause "lighting up" of the area.  So that's why they like what they see in the PET but still can't clear LJ.

The ENT specialist also told us the tumor is still on the thyroid.  Radiation rarely does any good there.  He most likely will have to remove the half with the tumor, but can leave the other half in place so there is still some thyroid function.  That was new.  I thought they had to take the whole thing.  He also told LJ that if his swallowing doesn't improve because his esophagus is too narrow, there is a surgery for that.  Unfortunately it has to be done more than once.  The esophagus is stretched open.  It lasts for a while, but then goes back, so if they do it a few times it seems to permanently open up.  He will send LJ in for an esophagus check before that decision is made.  Could be his is narrowed because of the radiation and simply needs to heal.  The good thing is he can do the initial stretch the same time he removes the thyroid.

Recently we saw the radiation doctor for a followup.  He told us there is a small mass on his upper lung that showed up on the scan.  It is a very strong possibility this is just a side effect of radiation.  That will be monitored to see if it clears up.   Again, not too concerned.  SO, if they aren't worried...we aren't either.  or so we say.

We saw his kidney doc who was pleased with the function of the left kidney, under the circumstances.  Both the urologist and nephrologist agree not to do anything to the tumors on the left kidney since the right kidney was benign.  High percentage that the left tumors are also benign.  They will do a scan every so often to determine the growth of the tumors.  If the growth is negligible, they will do nothing.  If they start to grow, they will treat them.  So another wait and see.  The kidney function number does put him in a stage 3 kidney disease category but on the low end.  He won't have any diet restrictions other than lay off the salt and drink water.  No physical restrictions either.  But he needs to pay attention to the salt and water.  That will be necessary to keep him from advancing to stage 4 or 5 and the need for dialysis.  We are still early in the recovery so his kidney function can improve and possibly put him at stage 2 which would be awesome.

Lastly, the oncologist sent LJ to a geneticist to see if it can be determined why his body makes tumors.  He went for his consultation and they have done a blood test so...yep...we wait.

The good news is..well I guess it really is all good so far...anyway.. the ENT told LJ to fight through the pain and drink his meals.  Since LJ and I always have different opinions on that, I asked the doctor to repeat it...basically so LJ knew I was right.  So in a nutshell...drink your food (like I said all along).  I will admit LJ did come home and drink a shake for one of his meals.  He told me it didn't taste AS bad as it did in the past and didn't burn like it used to so that's progress.  He has a plan on how to replace all his meals with drinking and eliminate the tube feeding but won't share it with me lol.  He knows that when he says it, it is set in stone.  So I guess it's a secret lol.  But at least we are making those baby steps.  If he truly gives it his all, I think he can be done with tube feeding by the end of the month.  So far he has done it once or twice a day.  But in the meantime........we wait lol.

LJ in February

LJ in July

When LJ started this journey, he weighed 250.  He now weighs 195 and that's actually a good weight for him.  He feels better and likes where he is at.  His goal is to keep his weight in that 190-200 range.  I think he can do it.  The pics don't really do justice to the change.  His shirt sticks out in the July one because of the feed tube.  He's definitely skinnier...but a healthy skinnier.  Unlike me.  I'm pretty sure I've gained every pound he has lost, dammit.



THE HOUSE:

Been sooooooooo frustrated we aren't in the house yet.  But they did FINALLY give us move in dates.  We do the initial walk thru 8/20, sign the papers 8/23 and the final walk thru and keys on 8/27.  Nothing like cutting it close, Meritage Homes.  We had no place to stay starting 9/1 lol.  All the local RV parks were full for the Labor Day weekend!  Geesh.  I'll be getting those darn keys on the 27th or I'm standing on somebody's' desk.  The true frustration is knowing we signed the purchase in February...gave them until June to use it as a model and it has just sat there ever since.  We could have been in it by now.  I told our sales guy (and now friend) David we would be staying with him if it's not done, lol.   I did drive by yesterday (July31) and they have actually started the work.  Sigh.... breath...  Put more money in the bank and quit bitchin'.  If you know me then.................


The Gr Grand BB, Noah

I'm dying to go see this little guy.  Thank goodness for social media.  I can watch him grow from afar.  He makes me laugh.  He can feed himself the bottle.  He actually isn't too bad with a spoon.  He's crawling, standing and ignoring his mom when she calls him like all little independent kids do, lol.  He does smile and laugh all the time.  He likes to please, I think.  Once LJ can totally take care of himself, I am off to England.  Want to see him before he starts school, for heaven's sake.  Until LJ is off the tube, he can't travel because we can't take his food.  So I get by with FaceTime and pictures.  But I really want to hug him.  He just turned 6 months July 24th.  Time is flying by.




ARIZONA

This is a cactus flipping mother nature off.  I'm sure of it.  Actually, I have been surprised how tolerable the heat is.  It honestly isn't that bad.  You do plan your days differently.  Do stuff early and get home.  The RV has been able to keep up with the 115 degree days so we are all good.  I have been over at the house a couple of 110 degree afternoons and am shocked at how tolerable it is in the shade.  The cabana has ceiling fans and it's quite comfortable sitting there.  Plus the house faces West so the backyard is in the east and is in the shade in the afternoon.  The pool is nice.  Be glad when I can get in it without fear of the neighbors calling the police because some whale broke into the pool next door trying to beat the heat lol.  I really need to start that diet just as sooooooon as we move in.  Haboobs are weird.  You see the warnings.  You know they are coming.  But when they hit it's just a bit windy with some dust.  No worse than windy days in the Nevada desert.  You still don't want to be outside, though.

pretty...wish I had taken it

We have had the pleasure of riding out a monsoon in the RV.  Thaaaaaaaat's fun.  Kinda like an E-ticket ride, lol.  Lots of shaking and rolling and not for a good reason.  But all in all it wasn't that bad and really was interesting.  The lightening shows are incredible. There's more due throughout August.  Wow...something exciting to look forward to!  Scooter doesn't like it.  He becomes quite the cuddle bug for the first half hour or so...then he's like "ok...no big deal.  I'm going to bed, but I'm not peeing outside.  I'll hold it.  Wind messes up my hair."   such a diva...

playing ball at the park

Speaking of SCOOTER

I can tell he's bored, but it's just too hot to go play.  I have taken him to the park by the house early in the morning so he can play ball.  But even then it's just too warm to do it for very long.  I bought him a life jacket for the pool so he can go swimming with me.  Looking forward to that.

He is quite the character, though.  He has decided the best way to wake me up in the mornings is not with little kisses...like he used to.  Not with a soft whine...like he used to.  But by jumping on me and pushing me with his front paws with all his might.  Then he stands on me and wags his tail.  Got to admit, it's pretty funny.  He's pretty proud of himself, too.

AZ Roadrunner

So... that's about it.  Just kinda rolling along.  Nothing really humorous to report, although I did let LJ drive up to Harbor Freight the other day with me as a passenger.  Scared the living crap out of me.  So I got in the driver's seat while he was inside.  He couldn't figure out why.  I just said...hey it's easier for you if I drive.  We won't die that way.  I guess that's what happens when you don't let someone drive for awhile, lol.  You forget how much they scared the crap out of you back then.  Not that he isn't an excellent driver, cuz he is.  Years of EVOC training and years of driving.  I just like to be in control...yea that's it.  Even if I do drive like an old lady now.  till next time......

#31 The Good...the bad...the ugly

I think I'll start with..THE UGLY.

Now some won't find this funny.  I did, though.  So as most of you know, LJ went in for his kidney removal surgery.  He came home after five days in the hospital.  They did send him home with a catheter in place.  He was so happy (not).  The next day we were to go to the Urologist's office to have the catheter removed.  Why they couldn't do it the hospital before we left is a mystery.

So I'm waiting for LJ to finish getting ready when he yells "Hey, babe!  Come look at this!"  I'm thinking I probably don't want to, but off I go.  He's standing there and says "Look!  I don't think that's right" and he points to "the boys".  I'm pretty sure my eyes got big and I said "nope..that's not normal."  "Well how bad is it?"  "What, you can't tell?"  "No, I can't see them but it doesn't feel right."  "Well picture a purple grapefruit."  and I start laughing.  He says it's not funny, but it kinda was.  I'm thinking, daaaaaaaaamn...that has to make it hard to sit.  He had a few choice words, but I assure him it's probably nothing.  And, on the bright side, we are on our way to the urologist so he can take a look.

So off we go to the doc.  Now I'm not going to go in with LJ because watching them remove a catheter is not high on my to do list.  He goes in...a half hour later he comes out.  I asked "did you pee?"  "Nope.  But they did take the catheter out."  and then he tells me the story.  Now the nurse has a routine to removing the catheter.  First they fill your bladder then they remove the catheter.  Then you are suppose to pee.  Well, as he lays back on the table he says "Can you look at this (the boys)?  Is that normal?"  Apparently she was a bit surprised by what she saw and tells him "Ummm..I'll be right back."  Well that had to be comforting, lol.  So off she goes and she brings back the physician's assistant.  She (yep, another woman) takes a look at the boys and says "Ummmm..I'll be right back."  Now I'm sure having two people look and immediately leave the room has him totally at ease.  So now the urologist comes in.  HE takes a looks and says it's totally normal after that type of surgery and not to worry.  It's just fluid collecting and will dissipate in a few days.  Might be a little uncomfortable (hahahahaha) but not concerning.  Whew...

So the entire routine was thrown off by the spectacle that was "the boys".  The nurse removed the catheter but failed to fill the bladder.  They offered to put it back in and do it correctly but LJ for some reason declined.  So he left with the instructions that if he didn't pee in the next couple hours to come back.  Fortunately he did and all was right with the world.  Well, except for the grapefruit.

But now ten days have passed and they are back to normal.  I don't think he thought my asking "how they hangin' " as a morning greeting was funny.  I kinda did.  I have photos, but they are in my personal collection.  You'll just have to visualize.

THE GOOD


His second day home was eventful.  After his tube feeding in the morning he was replacing the gauze pad that goes under the disc that's up against his belly.  As he was doing so, he accidentally pulls on the tube and it comes out about an inch.  Welllll that's not good.  They say if it moves a 1/4 inch to head to the ER.  So off we go to the hospital ER.  Of course my thought is we are going to spend the whole day here so I brought a book.  Everyone knows how ER's are.  Apparently in AZ they are very efficient.  We get to the ER and he is taken right back.  Within minutes the ER physician sees him and lets him know the radiologist will be in to check the tube in a few minutes.  How long depended on what the radiologist was doing at the moment.  I don't think we waited more than ten minutes when he showed up.  He did whatever it is they do and determined the tube was fine.  He added a little air to the balloon that's inside the stomach (Keeps the tube from coming out) and sent us on our way.  Whole thing took an an hour from car to ER to back to car.  Never even cracked open the book.  This is our third time visiting an ER while in AZ (three different ones).  Each time the care was quick and efficient.  Impressive.  But that's not the real "Good" part.

THE REALLY GOOD

LJ has seen doctor after doctor since the masses were discovered on his kidneys.  As you may remember, the CT he had done before radiation started showed masses on his right kidney that were so large it definitely had to be removed.  The radiologist broke the news of this cancer prior to radiation starting on the throat cancer.  Good news was it was found.  Although three different cancers (throat, thyroid and kidney) make LJ "special".

Next we saw the oncologist who told us the chemo he would receive with the radiation would have no effect on the kidney cancer.  But, because of the kidney issue, he would have to have a special, EXPENSIVE chemo that doesn't harm the kidneys.  The throat cancer is the most aggressive so radiation had to start immediately.  After he was done with that the right kidney had to be removed.  Based on what the oncologist has seen in her career, there was a 99% chance it was cancerous.  They were just too large and too many of them.  We weren't to worry, though, because kidney cancer historically is slow growing.  She, in turn, sent us to the Urologist since another opinion never hurts and he would be doing the surgery.  The Urologist concurred with the other two doctors.  The masses were multiple and large.  He had yet to remove a kidney with that presentation that wasn't cancer.  He agreed the throat cancer took priority and again told us kidney cancer is slow growing.  We have time.  He then sent us to a nephrologist (kidney doctor) to determine what kidney function LJ had and how we were to deal with the one remaining kidney after surgery.

The nephrologist agreed with the other three doctors.  99% chance the kidney growths were cancer.  Only once in his career had he seen a kidney like LJ's that wasn't cancer.  LJ's kidney function wasn't great which could mean he would need dialysis once the surgery was done.  Fortunately we determined his kidney function was down due to lack of hydration.  This was discovered after he spent five days in the hospital for dehydration due to lack of fluid intake because of the radiation treatments.  Once he was properly hydrated, the nephrologist told us his kidney function was great for his age and reduced the kidney disease stage from a 4 to a 2.  This meant, if all things went well, he most likely would not need dialysis.

So now he has the kidney surgery.  The urologist told both of us the kidney was difficult to remove since it was so large and just covered in masses.  He also took margin tissue for testing.  It looked like cancer on the kidney, but he didn't see where it had spread.  Testing would make that determination.  So we wait.

Last Friday we saw the oncologist.  She had the pathology report from the hospital.  NO CANCER! ALLLLLLL the tumors were benign.  All the surrounding tissue showed no cancer.  OMG.  He is in the 1%.  His remaining kidney will be watched.  No treatment to those little spots unless they begin to grow.  If they do, they'll freeze them.  UNBELIEVABLE.  His oncologist was very surprised but very happy.  She is sending LJ to a geneticist to see if there is a reason his body is making the tumors, but all in all, good news.  Today we saw his urologist.  His smile was huge.  He told LJ in all his years of doing this, this is the first time it hasn't been cancer.  He agreed we just watch the left kidney.  Removing the right kidney still had to be done.  You don't want the benign tumors to get larger.  It truly was the only way to be sure it wasn't cancer.  Biopsy of the kidney is never recommended as it tends to make the cancer spread quickly.  There was simply no reason to believe it wasn't cancer based on four doctor opinions with years in the field..based on research...and based on LJ's luck.  But it isn't.  It's a blessing.  One less fear.  He still has to maintain good kidney health which means watching certain foods, like salt, and drinking more water.  Finally something good for LJ.

As for the throat cancer, his oncologist scheduled his PET scan for this week.  We won't have those results for a week or two, but she is cautiously optimistic about the treatment for the throat cancer being successful.  She did have us keep an appointment with the neck surgeon, just in case.  In her mind an expert looking is better than a scan and certainly isn't going to hurt.  So we continue to wait.  But we wait with one less thing to worry about.

THE BAD

a little bigger than 400SF

Ok.  It's not that bad and has nothing to do with LJ and his cancer.  It has to do with our house.  I have honestly had about all I can take living in the tin can.  I was looking forward to moving in to the house at the end of the month.  But no.  The builder FORGOT to get the permit to convert the sales office back to a garage.  Forgot, my patooty... somebody didn't do their job.  I mean for heaven's sake.  We bought the house in February.  The sales office shut down early June.  Not a happy camper.  So now it will be sometime in August.  Poor David, the sales guy.  He was on the phone with the bosses all day before he told me.  It's not his fault.  It's the corporate office.  I was soooooo disappointed.  Now I have to remain in the 400SF home for another month.  He did get them to pay for a few more things as compensation, but what a pain in the ass.

To compound the problem, the RV park had someone moving into our spot August 1st through February 2020.  They would have to try to find a place to put us, which meant moving the rv.  Fortunately they like us and are aware of LJ's issues, so they spent a couple days moving things around.  We will be able to stay put through August.  I have made it clear to the builder we cannot extend past August.  Snowbirds start arriving in September and finding long term (over a couple days) slots anywhere is difficult.  As LJ has taught me.  It just is what it is.

IN CONCLUSION

So...it seems our life is spent waiting, lol.  I'll just be glad when all is back to normal.  LJ is trying hard to get off that feeding tube.  It just takes time.  I often eat stuff he loves in front of him as inspiration.  If I go to a restaurant I'll send him photos of my meal to show him what he's missing.  I think he appreciates that, a lot.  or maybe not.
It's my way of offering encouragement.😆



Scooter is doing well.  It's hot so he spends a lot of time napping under the A/C.

I look forward to LJ being....well....LJ.  I look forward to enjoying the new place, traveling and living life to the fullest.  I want to take another cruise.  I want us both to be able to see that new great grand baby.  So much living yet to be done.  The good thing is, in spite of chemo brain, my LJ is more and more like himself.  We laugh.  We tease each other.  We love each other.  Life isn't necessarily easy right now, but it's what we have and beats the alternative.

Keep those prayers and good thoughts coming because I truly believe they work.💗

#30 Two down....

Pre-op

Seems like it took forever to happen, but surgery on LJ's kidney is complete.  I will admit it has been stressful waiting.  You want the surgery to go well, but you hope they didn't wait too long.  But, at least it's over.  As I write, LJ is still in the hospital.  His surgery was four days ago, on the 20th of June.  It took a little over two hours.  I got a phone call from the OR nurse during the surgery telling me everything was going well.  I was happy they did that.  Makes the waiting a little easier.  I wasn't alone, though.  Bruce and Kathryn Clark came and sat with me for support.  

I wasn't able to see him after surgery.  While in recovery, he was choking and having difficulty breathing.  He was sent to ICU for observation.  They made me go home, which I did.  LJ and I have always agreed to stay out of the way and let the staff do their thing.  Scooter had been alone for over 6 hours and needed to potty...I was just going to sit in a hard chair in the waiting room and at home I was only ten minutes away.  I didn't sleep well at all that first night and was back at the hospital early the next morning.  

He seemed fine when I got there.  He was confused as to why he was in ICU so I told him what they told me.  We did learn that during all of this, while in recovery, somehow his feeding tube got pulled out so they had to put in another one.  He was blissfully unaware of them doing it, but knew it had been done.  Probably not a bad thing since the original one had been in there four months and the little stopper on top was getting weak.  He was happy to get the catheter out they had put in for surgery.  So now it was just heal and go home.  While in ICU we were visited by a nutritionist who spelled out his tube feedings and the Urologists NP ( he was in surgery).  She told us what he needed to do to go home and explained it takes a week or two to get the pathology back on the kidney.

While I was there, LJ had a furry visitor.  Maggie the therapy dog came to see him.  She's very sweet and sees all the patients in the hospital she can.  Of course she ignored him and sat by me, hahaha.

He did well the rest of the day and was able to breath and cough without assistance so they decided to put him in a normal hospital room.  I expected it to be a semi-private room but the nurse told us they don't even have semi-private rooms except on one floor.  She said they rarely use them.  So off to a private room with a view of the rooftop ventilation we went.  We had talked to the nutritionist and he wasn't to get any food, only IV fluids, until Saturday.  He did say his throat, surprisingly, felt better than before the surgery.  We are thinking maybe the intubation removed some of the muck that was in there (from the radiation).   He was having a little difficulty peeing so I told him not to wait if he can't go...tell the nurse.  He kicked me out once he got up there so he could rest, so off I went.  In the meantime, after I left, Bruce and Kath came in and immediately texted me about his feeding.  To make a long story short, back to the hospital I went to sort it all out.  Discovered LJ (chemo brain) was confused as to how much and when he was to get fed.  So after talking it over, the nurse and I were on the same page.  And we learned LJ gets confused easily.  They had placed a new catheter right after I left the first time since he was struggling to pee.  He went back to sleep and I went back home.  Another restless night for me.  According to him he slept like a baby, mainly because he didn't have to get up and pee every hour, lol.

Saturday we saw his Urologist.  He's a great guy.  He gave us his personal cell number in case we need to talk directly to him or have any concerns.  He said the surgery went well but the kidney was covered in masses, making it a little difficult to remove.  They took the right kidney, some surrounding tissue and some lymph nodes.  He said he saw nothing to indicate the cancer had spread.  It seems confined to the kidney only.  We won't know for sure until the pathology, but he felt pretty good about it.  LJ has good remaining kidney function it seems.  He will stay in the hospital until the "numbers" are where they want them, but he is improving every time they test so that's good.  LJ's left kidney has a couple small spots on it.  Doc says they won't freeze or section those until that kidney is doing well on it's own, probably a couple months.  He said there is no concern about those spreading as kidney cancer is very slow growing.  We are not to worry.

He feels the aggressive throat cancer and the right kidney were the most concerning and now that they have been addressed, it should be all up hill from here!

Now for the OMG really? part of the story.  You know there had to be one, right?  It us, after all.  

So night one in the regular room (Friday)...He tells me he almost killed the night nurse.  This from the guy who treats his nurses very well, lol.  Apparently he started choking and gagging on the buildup in his throat.  He can't breathe.  Nurse comes in and says "oh, I'll come back"!  He says he's reaching out for her, gagging, and she walks out of the room.  Now, in her defense, he was coughing, too, so ....  But she probably could have stayed, just in case.  He gets it under control.  A few minutes later it happens again.  She comes in again.......and leaves again.  When he got it under control again, I guess she came back to do her nightly check.  He of course read her the riot act.  I'm sure he used small four letter words and she put the "AH" sign on the door to warn the others, but he was right.  Why she left while he was choking is beyond me.  Of course he tells me about it the next morning when I get there.  I'm not happy but what's done is done.  He's ok now.  The day nurses are fine....or are they.....

The rest of Saturday goes well.  He's up and walking.  Still has the catheter and IV, but he's doing fine.  BP is high, but he's been off his meds for four days.  They started him back Saturday afternoon. At his request, so he can rest, I leave.  We text later.  He's doing fine.  Another restless night for me....He slept just fine.  Fortunately no overnight choking.  All is good with the world.

I went and saw him this morning (Sunday).  They have removed the bandages.  Little incisions, so scars won't be too bad.  The NP told him the catheter stays until he sees the doc after he is discharged.  Still no increase in food or the required passing of gas, so he can't go home.  He sends me on a mission to find a lighted hand mirror. (It has to do with his throat..don't ask, lol)

I was gone about two hours, running errands, looking for the elusive just right mirror.  I get back to the hospital with the mirror and walk into his room.  He is having a "chat" with the day nurse.  Oh geesh....

So as the story goes... He is up doing his walk.  He walks by the nurses having lunch.  In his words, he lingered there..because, you know.. food..

He gets back to the room and decides to brush his teeth.  At some point the IV becomes detached (at the connection, not the vein). He is now spewing blood everywhere.  He calls for the nurse.  They answer their phone "May I help you?"  Why yes.. my IV has disconnected and I'm bleeding profusely all over the place and am pretty sure I'm going to bleed to death.  "Ok..I'll tell your nurse."  He manages to get the IV put back together to stop the bleeding.  He looks at the clock and ten minutes has gone by.  Now, if he hadn't put it back together, I don't know exactly how much blood he would have lost.  He calls again.  "How can I help you?"  Repeat... "Oh, well your nurse is at lunch.  I'll be sure to tell her when she comes back". click.  So when I get in the room, his day nurse is back from lunch and in there hearing the story.  He made it clear he did not blame her but colorfully told her how he felt about the nurse who ignored him.  He said "What does she think?   I'm not seated in her section, so I don't get service?"  Poor nurse apologized profusely.  He did make it clear it was not her fault but it would probably be a good idea to keep the other one in protective custody.  Yea, I'm sure that was good for his blood pressure.  Oh well.  He's fine now.  They fixed his IV.  He kicked me out because the whole thing made him tired... Sigh.....so here I am.  Watching baseball and updating the blog, lol.

So,  for now this is where we stand:

Throat and thyroid cancer radiated and chemo given

Kidney cancer - Bad one gone, good one on standby for treatment

We won't know how successful everything has been until next month when they re-scan him, but fingers crossed.

House is moving forward...only a month to go.  They took down the fencing so it's actually starting to look like a home and not a model. 

Scooter is a little confused as to why dad left with me and didn't come back with me.  He keeps looking for him.  He lays on the couch looking sad.  Then he sees a fly, barks, gives chase and forgets he's sad.  He does sleep on LJs pillow at night, though.  He's eating, drinking and bringing me his toy to play, so he'll be fine.

And that's the way things are in the James' world.  Keep him in your thoughts and prayers.  I appreciate all the messages.  Forgive me if I don't have a chance to respond.    I'll just leave you with a Noah picture.  Can't wait to be able to see him in person.  Wonder if he cries with an English accent, HA!   Love you all!

NOAH!!
5 months old!!